Ho Ho Hum

For some reason I'm not feeling the holiday cheer. I generally enjoy the holiday festivities but this year I'm just not there. I'm not sad or blue...I'm simply not finding the glee right now. Maybe my mind is on overload between all of those damn responsibilities and things that have to be done leading up to the celebrations? Or perhaps the whole spirit of giving feels a bit lost...I just don't know. I'm just going through the motions of all of the prep.

I'm more looking forward to the new year beginning. This year has been a bit rough on us, as it has on too many. Comparatively, we're just fine. Our little trio can handle pretty much anything by now, as long as we keep "us" in tact, it's all okay.

Next year shows promise...Dan's making a movie, my work gig is steady, and Cole's happy. We plan to put in raised beds in our backyard for veggies and to do some updating to Cole's room (to make it more "boy" than toddler...). Having my hands in things relieves life's stresses. I'm going to learn to surf this year too...I want to be able to be in the water with Cole when he tries it next summer! I'd love Dan to try too...if we both were able to surf just a little, we could do it with Cole whenever he wanted to...It'd be a great family thing...

Thankfully, there's nothing major coming up for Cole. He can enjoy the rest of first grade with only the responsiblity of homework to worry about. And so far, he loves homework...Big smiles for homework! Most of his homework is math, which for whatever crazy reason he loves and does very well with. They also have to write a short story each week and that seems to be something he likes too. His stories are usually very amusing. When assigned to write about a member of the community he would like to have come over to his house, and what they would do, he wrote about his pediatrician coming over and playing tag in the backyard...laughing as we wrote the story because he knew it was a funny thing to want to do...man do I love that kid!

Man? Did I really just write that? Admittedly, in my head I use a lot of less than choice words that I usually edit out when I write...but what other word would you use to punctuate the feeling? God? I really try to avoid using that...Damn, same...Man works sometimes, especially if you grew up in the 60's/70's...it's just part of the repetoire. And on that note...

ZZZzzzz

Before having a child I admit to completely taking sleep for granted. Since having Cole, I find a good night's sleep to be somewhat elusive. The first six months of his life were spent with me pumping breast milk (Cole never learned to suck and is fed through a g-tube) every few hours and then on opposite hours, feeding the little boy. By the time I ended the affair with the pump, he was sleeping well and not needing to be fed throughout the night, and I felt lucky...I had so many friends who suffered longer periods with poor sleepers. Little did I know that a couple of years into it, after I'd been lulled into believing that my angel was a wonderful sleeper, his routine shifted. I think it started with a daylight savings switch. Cole started waking up in the 4's (a.m.s!). Sometimes, the 3's. He'd be going to bed at 7 pm so by 4 am he'd have a had a pretty decent sleep...(decidely not!). He'd just be wide awake and because I was not, I'd let him watch something in bed with me so I could doze. This strange habit of waking at odd hours has become a regular thing with the boy. For months each year, he settles into jags of waking up in the 4's and not being able to go back to sleep. Even if he goes to bed a little later, he still wakes up at the same time and somehow manages to make it through his day. During the time he's asleep, he sleeps deeply and peacefully...He's still what I might consider a good sleeper...He's just an extreme riser! I AM NOT!!! My day doesn't end until he's settled into bed and I've cleaned up after the day. Then I crash with Dan and watch TV, or read, or whatever...I try to go to sleep by 11pm, and lately even earlier, but 4 or 5 hours is simply not enough sleep for me...The dear boy also has taken to a new habit, bourne out of him not wanting to be awake alone, where he topples over me as I try to sleep to the hum of Blues Clues or Sid the Science Kid, with a huge dopey smile on his face. Or he stretches his legs out across the bed so that he can kick and nudge me in the belly or butt, whichever way I happen to be turned, until I sit up with him and mindlessly watch his shows...There's simply not a lot to do at 4 in the morning...When I feel spritely (HA!), we read, but it's dark and cold and I am just not ready to get out of bed and start the day...I dream of the day he decides 6 am is a good time to wake...I'll be cheerful and rested and the only reason I won't want to get out of bed is that I'm too busy snuggling my late sleeper! Ah....A girl can dream can't she???

Catching Up

I've been feverishly working on a project for the past few weeks so everything feels neglected, save work. The holiday brought a much appreciated break, but the contemplation of thanksgiving started the week before. I attended an event for Vital Voices (at this amazing home in Malibu..dreaming...), where a Kenyan woman shared her life story (thus far, she's just 30 so I suspect she'll have far more to accomplish and share over the next decades!), and her dreams of starting the first school for girls in her village. She's been educated in the US, a major feat for a woman from a small village in Kenya, and her story, while somewhat familiar in a world that more easily reaches across oceans and continents, resonates deeper when shared in a personal environment. The evening reminded me that our lives all touch one another and that by simply sharing knowledge, we support each other.

The next day we attended the opening of Halloween City, a city that the first grade created. They spent the past couple of months electing officials, creating jobs, making goods to sell (wonderfully tacky, feathered trash cans sold by the sanitation department, check book covers at the bank, book marks at the library, jewelry, and more). There were buildings that were decorated and set up in the three classrooms where each business showed their wares. Cole was one of the librarians. There were four and each one wrote a story and read their story to any customers/guests who dropped by the library. Cole's was recorded into his Tango! so he could read about why he'd like to be an astronaut...It was amazing...The whole city was so detailed and the kids created everything...They have another project after winter break, and then after spring break they are building a rain forest as the culmination of their section on environment...I don't remember doing such creative, interesting projects when I was in elementary school...let alone in first grade!

The long holiday weekend was festive. We had a friend in from the UK so we took a year off from the big family festivities and hosted a dinner ourselves to share the holiday with him and with our dear friends Nancy, Muse & Sophie, and grandma Babe...Dan, Nancy and I cooked together which was fun and relaxing and as it should be for Thanksgiving feasts! The nieces stopped by for little while after the family dinner which pleased Cole to no end...If I could tape the squeal of glee he shouted when they burst through the door, everyone would want it for a ring tone or something...it was sheer delight!

Friday I took Cole to a birthday party at a jungle themed gym with a forty foot blow up slide, among other torture devices...We climbed up, no easy feat, and then I looked down and had a moment of panic...Not a fan of heights...alas, no way down but to slide so slide we slid...and it was fun...fun enough to do it again!

But the real fun came Saturday when we went hamster balling...A friend of a friend had one of the Bolt promotional giant blow up hamster balls and we took it to our park for some rolling...We all tried it and I now wish I had been less shy about doing it more because I really want to do it again, and again...There's nothing like sheer unadulterated play time to relieve any stress or sorrow...

Yesterday we put up our tree...This year we went with the fake silver sort of 60's style mod tree...We're going away after the holiday so we thought it would be better than a live tree this year...It's decorated in pink and silver and is completely, but beautifully, cheesy. I personally love it. I know Dan would like a more traditional set-up (next year)...but the sparkly pink tree really cheers me up and amuses Cole...

And now today...I should be working...Cheers!